6 THINGS TO HANDLE WISELY INMARRIAGE by PASTOR FELIXYOUNG

6 THINGS TO HANDLE WISELY IN
MARRIAGE by PASTOR FELIX
YOUNG
Scriptures. 1 timothy 3:4

1. Money

Inability to manage money have left so many
marriages in a state of permanent damage.
money is like a two edged sword in marriage,
how is it a two edged sword? when there is no
money in a marriage and couple are not able to

manage the situation could pose a big problem,
and when there is too much money in a
marriage and couple are not able to manage
properly it could also course problem.
Money could be a problem in marriage when
spouse lie about their finances, no matter how
small your financial capacity couples should
always be transparent with their take home.
When your wife knows your financial capacity
she knows the limits to her demands for a
month. If your wife knows you don’t have, she
will not place a demand on you except a wicked
woman.
Another area again I see money as a big
problem is where partners become stingy with
money, some men tend to odd their money and
use for extended family members girlfriends etc.
Some men when they have money you don’t see
them at home, the moment the money finishes
they becomes loving husbands again, that will
course a big problem for your family whether
you are a man or a woman.
Again sometimes the woman in the marriage
may have more money power, the bible calls
you a help meat it not for you turn your
husband into a wife, and you begin to tell
everybody who cares to listen that you paid the
rent last month, how you paid the children
school fees and how you are the one
maintaining the cars, or how you singlehandedly
build your house, this will help bring down you
husbands moral and rubbish his face before
people, and will make your friends and family
members look down on him and this will course
rift in your marriage
So the recommendation here is that couples
should be transparent with money, and see it as
a privilege to help the family with financially.
And if the woman is blessed financially to help
array the family she must be wise and loud
mouthed.

2. Conflict ;

conflict is another thing you must handle with
wisdom and patience. I always say there is no
small conflict.
There is no marriage without conflict, it could
be major or minor, conflict is conflict, and this
is another thing to be handled with care and
wisdom There will always be misunderstanding
in marriage, but the misunderstanding itself is
not the problem but how these
misunderstandings are handled .Both of you
were born of different parents grew up in
different backgrounds so you are not expected
to agree on everything. You cannot change an
adult you can only manage an adult during
conflict be careful what you say because words
said cannot be withdrawn. So we must pray for
wisdom to manage conflict,
In managing conflict this is where you see the
maturity of the couple in play, where the man or
the woman is not mature you see it manifest in
this area.

3. In-laws;

Whenever I join couples I always tell them you
are not married to this man alone but to his
family, we must understand and know that the
man or the woman did not just drop from the
tree he came from somewhere, a family gave
him that identity and life you saw and was
attracted to.
When you marry somebody you cannot marry
somebody in isolation of his family though we
advise that the family don’t interfere in the
marriage they can only give them good counsel ,
yes agreed there are members of families that
are bossy, wicked but we cannot rule out the
fact that some are also God fearing, kind and
caring.
While some will want to come and dictate in
your husband house others can contribute
meaningfully toward the developed of your
family, so we must pray for wisdom to handle
family members.

4. Third party;

When we talk about third party here we are
talking about people that you will have to
manage apart from your in-laws, these
categories of people are people like your
neighbor your friends your husband friends. You
must manage these group of people in a such a
way that they will not end up running the affairs
of your family for you .
Where couples are not able to manage these
third parties it could result to crisis in the
marriage so we should seek wisdom from the
lord to manage third party
A lot of people have become very jealous when
their partner gets connected with a third party
maybe collogue of the opposite sex etc. so
many married people have not been able to
manage this area very well in marriage and this
could course tension and even divorced in
some marriages, why because some partners
cannot manage third party.

5. Children;

I have seen situation where a husband and wife
were pulling through very beautiful the moment
children begin to come in they start having
problems, not that children are bad in
themselves but because couples are not able to
manage the situation
You hear where the husband start saying my
wife doesnt have time for me anymore and
stuffs like that. Again we have situations were
the mothers get over protective of the child.
Not allowing the child get disciplined, men are
also guilty of this too. we must be able to
manage the children very well and bring them
up in the fear of the lord to become responsible
citizen and should be able to teach them how to
respect value.
So many time where children are not thought to
respect value and they become wayward can
course real problem for couples.

6. SEX.

Sex not managed property could spell doom for
any marriage. When somebody who is sexually
active gets married to somebody who is not
sexually active, this could be a serious
problem if not properly managed.
The other day somebody went to report her
husband to her pastor that her husband was an
animal in bed and she cannot take it anymore,
this problem may eventually end in a divorce or
separation. Now it is not only the men that are
sexually active the women are too.
Now we are not saying being sexually active is
bad or anything but one must be able to
manage the setuation if not one may be
tempted to go get satisfaction outside the
marriage which is not only a sin to God but a
curse on that marriage.